Stacey and her Miracles

Deported

2009-09-08T23:32:00.000-07:00

I left Ecuador at the beginning of July because I had been gifted a round trip ticket with the main purpose of seeing my brother and other family members. My plan was to return today to Quito and stay 3 weeks. Among my very lengthy to-do list was to sell all my stuff (including a vehicle), turn in my apartment, visit all the Miracles, get some medical stuff taken care of, and get some legal stuff taken care of for the official turning over of Precious Miracles, and pack up some stuff to come back to the states with.

After a long day of traveling I got up to the little window with the customs agent and hand him my passport. He runs it through and gets a strange look on his face. He says, did you leave here with an expired missionary visa?
Ok so let me back up a little. I've been a resident in Ecuador for the past 9 years as a missionary. Every 2 years I needed to reapply and renew said visa for about $250. This last year I saw that it ran out in May and I left in July. I did a whole bunch of paperwork and paid a $200 fine and I thought that was that.
BUT.... just to make sure I asked (before I left) if the stamp in my passport saying I had let a visa expire and a fine was paid would affect my reentry to the country. I was assured that it would NOT. The officer said that I could return as a tourist and not as a missionary. No problem right?

So back to tonight.... the officer looked up at me and said I have to deport you. You are not allowed reentry into this country. I looked at him and said, "You are NOT serious?!?" But he was. I was escorted by an armed police officer to a corner of the airport (still in plain sight of all the other passengers). As the different officers tried to figure out what to do with me, I called several people apologizing for waking them up at midnight. No one could help me. Even a police officer friend of mine said there was nothing he could do. So after bawling my eyes out and begging them to understand my situation, it became very clear to me that I was not going to win this one. I asked what will you do with me. They said they'd lock me up for the night. Yes you read that right. They'd lock me up for the night and then put me on the first flight out in the morning.
I even offered to have someone escort me to my apartment just so I could leave all the gifts I had brought people and at least fill my suitcase up with some clothes. They said they couldn't. I asked if I could give my suitcases to a friend because it was filled 100% with stuff to stay here for people. They said they couldn't do that either.
So here I sit in my little cell that consists of a toilet and two grungy bunk beds. But notice that I'm writing this online. So... there are no sheets for the bed or soap to wash my hands but they have WIFI. I'll probably laugh about that some day... not now though.

I told my Dad earlier that I thought it was going to be very difficult to leave this country. You know what? Now? not so much. I'm pretty sure I'll leave shaking the dirt off my feet. I'm a little bitter.

As for all the stuff I was going to get done? Well, I have to figure out some stuff like someone else is going to have to try to sell my stuff and empty my apartment. Obviously I can't do medical or legal stuff. Obviously I can't go see the kids and say goodbye. I'm not sure why this is happening but once again I will remember that God is in control. He either ordered this or permitted it. And I am safe and protected. I'll update when I can.

SO EXCITED!!!!

2009-06-30T16:03:00.000-07:00

This is hilarious. I don't blog often....but I did this morning. And it was pretty much a whine fest of why the adoption thing won't happen and why it's taking so long.....
This afternoon I get a phone call saying the girls' family is going to be in Quito TOMORROW night. How's that for a quick answer?
Wow! Talk about no warning. Of course I've wanted this for so long but then when it's on me so suddenly, it took my breath away.
There's a lot to do!
The girls are beside themselves with excitement. They have lots of questions. My favorite was, "Can't you come with us? Come on please?!?"

June 30

2009-06-30T06:18:00.000-07:00

I know no one can give an exact date with all this adoption stuff... I get that. But I was more or less assured (by my s.w.) that the girls would be gone by the end of June. Hmmm look at that. It's June 30.

I am trying SO hard to be patient. I know in my heart God's timing is perfect. I know He's not making a mistake. And this detail isn't on a pile on His desk that He just hasn't gotten to yet. I get that too.

But it's so hard. Today is Zac's 2nd round of chemo. Yesterday Mom left. It's hard to wait. Plus the girls are ready to go. They constantly pray and ask for their new family. I can only imagine it's 100 times worse for their family to wait.

Don't misunderstand me though. I enjoy every day I have with the girls. I know I'm going to miss them beyond belief when they leave. I love, love, love being with them and we have so much fun. I told a friend yesterday it's like an ongoing party around here. (As you can probably tell by the pictures!)

So.... since this is all completely out of my control, I suppose I should just continue to trust God and I should continue to learn patience. Please pray for those two things with me. Thanks!

The waiting game

2009-06-18T13:53:00.000-07:00

My mom came to visit me and it's been amazing! This had been the longest stretch of time that I had not seen a single member of my family and it was truly affecting me. To see my mamita has been great!

We've had a lot of fun with Nataly and Joselyn. They love their "Abuelita."

Today we did bumper cars! Yesterday she took us to KFC and that's a HUGE treat around here!

We went to the doctor yesterday to get one step closer to bringing their forever family down here.

It seems to be dragging out....and it's so hard to wait. It's so hard to explain to the girls that NO one wants to wait this long but it's what we have to do.

At the doctor's office we met the social worker from the agency and she gave us a package from the forever family. Two brand new dresses, sweaters and loads of hair things were among the surprises. They were giddy with excitement! There was also a letter and a video and a little booklet of pictures. In the waiting room I let them look through the pictures.

They recognized everyone right away. They pointed excitedly to the pictures and said, "look there's my Daddy.... that's my big sister, that's my baby brother.... there's Mommy!"

It was so precious! The s.w. was wiping away tears!

Hopefully this excrutiating waiting game won't be much longer!

I can't even begin to imagine how hard this is on the family... to have 2 beautiful, precious little girls and not be able to meet them yet! We keep trusting in God's timing!

The pictures are of the girls primping up their Abuelita. She got the full-on salon treatment!

You Were There

2009-05-13T11:25:00.000-07:00

This song really was what I needed to hear today. Thought I'd share it. It's an Avalon song....

I wonder how it must have felt when David stood to face Goliath on a hill. I imagine that he shook with all his might until You took his hand, and held on tight, 'Cause You were there, You were there in the midst of danger's snare.
You were there, You were there always. You were there when the hardest fight seemed so out of reach
Oh, You were there, You were always there .You were always there.
So there he stood upon that hill, Abraham with knife in hand was poised to kill. But God in all your sovereignty had bigger plans and just in time, You brought a lamb.
'Cause You were there, You were there in the midst of the unclear. You were there, you were there always. You were there when obedience seemed to not make sense. You were there, You were always there, You were always there.
So haven't I learned that my ways aren't as high as Yours are, and You alone keep the universe from crumbling into dust. You are God and though we would not have understood You, there You were hanging blameless on a cross. You would rather die than leave us in the dark. Every moment, every planned coincidence just all makes sense with Your last breath. You were there, You were there, during history's darkest hour. You were there, You were there always. You were the Victor and the King. You were the power in David's swing. You were the calm in Abraham. You are the God who understands. You are the strength when we have none, You are the living, Holy one. You were, You are and You will always be the Risen Lamb of God. You were, You are and You will always beThe Risen Lamb of God

Beginning of the end.....

2009-04-30T12:33:00.000-07:00

I got word today from Nataly and Joselyn's "new" parents. It's official. The girls have been assigned to their forever family. From the little that I know as of today (pictures with detailed descriptions, and a letter) I could not have hand-picked a more suitable family for these 2 precious miracles.
I should be ecstatic right? So why can I hardly see the computer screen through the tears in my eyes? This part of my job is always a pardox. It is always bittersweet. I have been praying for this family since 2006. I have been praying that God would select and prepare the best family for these two little girls. And He has! They seem so ideal. And although I've been praying for this to happen, now that it IS happening, my heart is breaking.
As of tomorrow I will have been their foster mom for 5 months. That doesn't seem like a very long time. But it is 5 months of 24/7. Every waking moment (and some of the asleep ones too!) have revolved around these girls. I love them so much. I really feel like I've gotten a handle on this mom thing. We have a good thing going. Why does it have to end? I can't picture my days without them. I can't picture my life without them.
I don't feel ready to let them go. Would I ever be ready though?
None of us ever have the assurance of tomorrow. Our lives can change in the blink of an eye. I see it as a blessing and a privilege to have a set time frame of when mine will change. I will enjoy every last minute, every last experience, every last detail. I will treasure them until the day comes where I have to release my grasp on my little girls.

Easter Eggs

2009-04-11T13:58:00.000-07:00

Today we colored eggs and then I hid them during nap time. The girls were so cute finding them. They didn't see it as a competition but rather kept pointing out eggs to each other to help each other along. Flor joined in too!

Princess for a day...

2009-04-07T12:13:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I was telling the girls some stories, among them was Cinderella. Their eyes were huge with anticipation as I told how the fairy godmother got Cinderella beautiful to go dance with the prince.

When I was through Naty and Josy were jumping up and down and Naty says, "can we play that story." So naturally, I assumed they wanted to become princesses.

I said, "sure!"

Naty gets out all their hair things, Josy runs to the dress up bin and pulls out a tiara and they started fixing ME up!

I was surprised and very amused. I asked them if they wouldn't rather be the princesses. Naty said, "No, you need to be a princess so you can find your prince! When we leave with our new parents, you are going to be all by yourself. Yep, you need a prince."

I don't know when I have laughed that hard!

Adapt me, Transform me, Mold me

2009-03-25T05:31:00.001-07:00

I read this in our morning devotions today. I'm sure it was written just for me just for today.

"No pronuncies oraciones del tipo: 'Consuelame, ayudame a vivir sin contratiempos, librame de este mal rato.' Ora mas bien: 'Adaptame, transformame, moldeame, aunque me duela.'"

Do not pray, "Comfort me, help me to live without setbacks, free me from this bad time." Rather pray, "Adapt me, transform me, mold me even if it hurts."

To say I'm struggling at being completely on my own with 3 little girls is an understatement. I've looked for other options/solutions to the struggle and they have not worked out.

I have to believe that for some reason God is allowing the 4 of us to stay together. I feel like I can't do this but He isn't opening any other doors right now so.....

my prayer has changed from

"Lord, help me find a more suitable place for Flor, send someone to help me and give me relief," to "Lord give me the strength, love, patience, and wisdom to care for these three Precious Miracles (Serious emphasis on the Precious!!!!) and to do it with a content heart."

Frustrated and overwhelmed....

2009-03-14T17:14:00.000-07:00

Since Flor arrived in my home I have had a woman helping me 3 times a week. She would come on Tuesdays and Thursdays and her main job was to take Flor to therapy. Upon returning she would also help with the cooking and cleaning of the house. On Saturdays she came to help me take the girls out for the day. (Zoo, park, Latacunga, etc).
I had really organized my life to make sure I did all my grocery shopping on Thursdays when she was here, banking or any other errands on Tuesdays. I did doctor's appointments or lunch appointments on these two days as well. Last Saturday I was able to go do a children's program and witnessing in a park with a group from my church knowing she would watch the girls.
She was a big help.
Today she asked to speak to me at 3:55 (she was scheduled to leave at 4). She asked me for her pay because she would not be returning.
WOW!
So now the "single mom of 3" has really set in. I feel so alone. I feel trapped. How am I going to cope?
How do I take Flor to therapy? What do I do with Naty and Josy while Flor is in therapy? How do I do groceries or anything else with 3 kids? I know women do it all the time. But I don't. I don't know how. I'm so overwhelmed. I really have no way of leaving this house at all without piling all 3 in the car with me. That is so daunting. I just don't think I have what it takes to be the only parent or caregiver or adult influence to these 3 girls. I don't think I can be everything they need me to be. And I don't think I can do this job completely on my own.

My girls taking the pictures....

2009-03-09T15:50:00.000-07:00

Josy and I are having a longest hair contest.... so we had Naty take our picture today. Of course then Josy wanted to take a picture too. They're pretty good little photographers my lil' ladies!

Cutest 3 lil'girls in the world!

2009-02-27T13:05:00.000-08:00

I walked in the girls room last week and saw Naty holding Flor and "reading" her a book... She is SO precious to me! The second picture is Naty dressed up in "new"clothes that I found in our storage room. She asked me after she was dressed to take her picture because she felt like a lady.

The third pic is my Flower.... and she is as pretty as one!

And lastly my giggly Joselyn who is ALWAYS available to pose for my camera. I love my girls. I can really not imagine what my life will be like when this phase of it is over. I sometimes wish this was forever......

ZOO!

2009-02-14T15:04:00.000-08:00

Today is little Carla's sixth birthday. So, I felt brave and decided to go get her from FHC last night to have a slumber party. They had bubble baths and movie with popcorn last night. Then today we had a yummy breakfast, opened Carla's gifts and took off to the zoo. It was so much fun. She loved it. They all loved it. Nataly's favorite animal was a monkey with another tiny monkey on his back. Joselyn's favorite animal was the lion... yes an african lion in the Quito zoo (I was impressed!). Carla's favorite animal was the galapagos tortoise and Flor's favorite animal was the bull at the petting zoo. He liked her too and licked her hand. If you know me at all you know that that was my least favorite part of the whole trip and I was quick with the wet wipes and purell! =) We had a fun day. I'm exhausted. Such a good kind of exhausted though.

2009-02-01T14:11:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, the girls and I went to Latacunga (about 2 hours away) to see "my" boys there. We had a fun road trip and it was good to have a mini Precious Miracles reunion with 6 of the former members. Please, please pray for these kids to get their forever families soon! They have waited SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO long! I know God's timing is perfect but I'm so impatient. =)

2009-01-11T14:03:00.000-08:00

Child #3

2009-01-11T05:20:00.000-08:00

Do you ever think you've told everyone something super important only to find out you haven't told anyone? Please say that you have so I don't feel like dementia has set in!!!!

I have completely spaced telling ya'll that I have a third child in my house now. So... my family of 3 has become 4. I have THREE precious little girls living in my apartment with me now. If I thought being a single "mom" to 2 was hard.... I had NO idea!

Flor, my latest arrival, was also part of the Precious Miracles family. She just turned four years old and has severe cerebral palsy. She is about the size of an 18 month old and developmentally about 10 months old.

She is a TON of work and juggling her and her special needs along with my 4 and 5 year old (and I've added homeschooling to the mix) is wearing me out. But I'm hanging in there and overall I feel very content with the work I've been given.

To all you moms out there: my respects!!!!! This is hard work!

I LOVE love LOVE love comments.... especially encouraging ones. So, if you're reading these posts please take a second to let me know. Thanks!

Towel heads

2008-12-29T16:04:00.000-08:00

I need to keep up with this thing more frequently. I have so much going on with the girls I don't know where to start.

We are doing very well and they have adapted amazingly to my life/schedule/rules/etc. We had a great Christmas! I had a blast showering them with gifts. But it was extremely hard to be without my family. Only the 2nd time in my entire life that I haven't spent Christmas with my parents and I was really feeling their absence.

After showers tonight they asked to have their hair wrapped in towels like mine is every morning. So cute!!!! =)

My Princesses!

2008-12-13T18:30:00.000-08:00

We were invited to a Christmas party last night. So I had a BLAST getting the girls all dolled up for it. I bought them new shoes (frivolous shoes that were on sale!!!!)

I really think I am essentially just playing "house" but with live children. I'm having such a blast.

The girls are doing such a great job and we are one very happy family. I'm so blessed! These two are the epitomy of "Precious" and "Miracles".

Putting up the Christmas tree

2008-12-03T18:44:00.001-08:00

On Naty and Josy's first day we put up the Christmas tree.... so stinkin' cute!

Here's some pics. The first one cracked me up since there were 6 ornaments on the same branch...darling!

Josy is the serious one (she does laugh sometimes!) She liked that Santa because he had glasses like hers. Naty is a happy cutie!

Nataly and Joselyn

2008-11-30T15:01:00.000-08:00

Some or most of you may get my prayer letter... so you know the big news in my life. For those who don't, I'm becoming a foster mom of Nataly (5) and Joselyn (almost 4) tomorrow!

It's a long story and I don't want to get into it but their current foster family has asked me to take them back. Since Precious Miracles as a home is not functioning (but as a foundation it is) I really saw no other option but to take them into my apartment with me.

Yikes! I know the job ahead of me is going to be HUGE! But I also know that it's my favorite job and the most rewarding that exists. I'm very excited to be a full-time caregiver. I'm essentially a single mom of 2 from one day to the next.

They are sweet girls and I'm blessed to have them directly in my life again! Please pray for us! We are all bound to feel a whole mess of emotions in the next few days, weeks, months etc. But I know with God's help we'll get through this. Oh and before anyone else asks, let me just tell you that the girls are in the process of being adopted in the U.S. and they will stay with me until that day. But there is no way of knowing how long that will be. But I'm up for the challenge!

This pic (above) was taken 2 weekends ago at an outing. There will be many many more to come!

Oh and to answer another question I've been asked. I will continue to help out at For His Children while the girls are in school. They've been going to a preschool and I'm going to keep them in it for a little stability in their crazy lives. They have their friends and they love their teachers. And... it gives me a few hours every morning to do the things I need to do without hauling two little ones around with me. =) So I'll be working a few hours a week still at FHC. And the rest of my days, nights, weekends I'll be a mom.... YAY!!!!

2008-10-30T13:31:00.000-07:00

This is a pic when my brother was in town... I took him to the top of a mountain. You can see Quito behind our heads. Brrr it was chilly

This is harder than I thought....

2008-10-30T13:21:00.000-07:00

I haven't posted in a while... because I don't want to bring everybody down. I'm so not dealing with things correctly. This whole transition has been way more difficult that I expected. All month I feel like it has been non-stop with the moving of my parents out of Ecuador. And every single day has been filled with sadness. It's not getting better or easier. I just cry all the time (when no one's looking). Mom leaves on Monday really early. Dad's already gone.
In the process of moving them, I have had to move all the Precious Miracles stuff into storage until I figure out what the next step is.
My dream? To re-open right away. I'm SO ready! I can't wait to set up cribs and put cute little chubby babies in them!!!!
Legally, I'm ready. Emotionally, I'm ready. Financially, not at all ready. So I'm trying to hang in there to see if my financial support picks up. I'm also looking for a place to re-open. I always lived in Cumbaya (yes like the song!!!!) because my parents were there. Well, obviously that's not a factor anymore. Should I be in Quito somewhere? Should I go back to Cumbaya just cause I know my way around and the weather's a bit better there?
Or... there's a possibility of moving to a beach city so I'd be closer to some other missionaries. So please if anyone is still reading these, join me in praying. I have no clear direction one way or another. I just know I'm supposed to be in this country rescuing babies.
And I want to start (continue) NOW!!!!
=)

Family

2008-10-12T13:31:00.001-07:00

My mom has been here for a little over a week. My dad gets in tomorrow night. My brother comes in later this week. I am so blessed to have this time. It's an emotional time to say the least. I am very aware, painfully aware that living in Ecuador alone as opposed to living in Ecuador with my family is drastically different.
I also know that during this time that I have already been alone I kept looking forward to their visit as "when mom and dad get back." I know that they aren't "back." They are just visiting. I can say it, I can type it but it means nothing to me. I am definitely not accepting the reality. But I have peace amidst the storm. I know beyond a doubt that this is where God has placed me for such a time as this. I can't fathom what life will look like without them. But for the next couple of weeks I am going to SOAK them up!
I am pretty sure that this is the last time all four of us (The original four that came to Ecuador in 1979) will all be together in this country that has meant such a great deal to us. That's difficult to swallow.

cabbage patch Yajaira

2008-10-01T13:48:00.000-07:00

Ok,
I know we're not supposed to have favorites.... but seriously! how cute is this child?

I know she has to be part Cabbage Patch doll!!!! I'm considering checking out her little bottom to see if there's a signature on it!

She's my fav of the week....

It really shouldn't hurt to be a child.

2008-09-26T13:58:00.000-07:00

I was asked yesterday (pretty late) if I would go to Latacunga to the other home that For His Children runs. I have to admit I was pretty annoyed. I had lots of things to do today. Important stuff like laundry and catching up on cataloging and organizing photos! (note the sarcasm!)
But I did what I was told. I was not completely aware of what I was being asked to do.

So I got a ride with a friend and went down (2 hours) to Latacunga. When I got there I saw 4 little girls who are new to the home. Genesis 5 (and the oldest kid at FHCL) Alison 4, Brandy 2 and Andrea 2.
Genesis and Andrea are sisters and Alison and Brandy are sisters and neigbors with the other 2 girls.
The police came and removed these girls from their home (which NEVER happens here!) The girls had been left repeatedly by themselves from about 6 am until 6 pm locked inside a dark room that had an overwhelming stench. When the cops went to rescue the girls he found 2 of them screaming and one licking the floor. All four of them were starving and filthy. The two younger girls are not toilet trained and they were not wearing diapers.

The 4 girls were taken to FHCL on Wednesday. I was asked to go today to do the admittance forms of the girls. This is usually done at the moment of their arrival but no one could go yesterday and really, no one but me could go today. I brought the little girls into the office to take their photos and check for any signs of abuse (standard upon admittance of any child). I wasn't sure how I was going to put the girls at ease. Here I am a tall white strange lady getting all up in their business!
But all my years of child care and child protection came into play. God was definitely right by my side the whole time. I had just the right words to say to comfort them and I was able to get the necessary pictures for their documentation. I was devastated to find out that all four little girls has most definitely suffered physical abuse (besides the obvious neglect!) Two of them most likely have suffered sexual abuse. I don't need an MD to see those signs.
I kept a smile on my face as I finished up and when the Tia left with the girls I sat in the office and cried.
I felt terrible that my oh so important schedule almost kept me from meeting these 4 precious little miracles. I wanted to ask you guys to please pray for Genesis, Alison, Andrea, and Brandy. Only God knows what the future of these 4 dolls is going to be.
I stayed for a couple hours with all the children. By the end, Genesis gave me a big hug and asked when I was coming back to see her. She's been so hurt and yet she's still so trusting... amazing! I assured her I'd be back next week.

Re-opening Precious Miracles

2008-09-23T18:03:00.000-07:00

Hello Friends,
I've been hesitant to write this because somehow that makes it more official and I'm a big coward... but I feel God leading me to re-open Precious Miracles as a home for abandoned children. I'm also seeing that this time around it will also double as a daycare for very needy families.
I'll write a prayer letter soon with more details and the story of Tanya who led me to this decision. But for now I need prayer! What's new right? I always need prayer! Please pray for me to listen to God's direction in this HUGE next step for me. Please also pray for God to provide the finances. I feel like that's the only thing stopping me right now. If this is of HIM, He will provide. My other request is that God will send the right people to help me out. I'm not silly enough to do this alone again. We need a team for this to work and I'm still looking for my teammates!
I am so excited I can hardly stand it... I can't wait to have a house full of noise and chaos again. =) Please keep me in your prayers!

My Adorable Apartment!

2008-09-18T12:49:00.000-07:00

I thought some people might be interested to know that I found a place to live...YAY! I still can't believe I did that all by myself. =) I called more than 20 places, visited about 10.... and finally came across my cute lil' apartment. I signed the contract for a year. By this weekend should have internet. (I'm doing this at work...shhh!)

I moved in this last weekend thanks to some good friends of mine and I have no regrets. It's a great place, very safe, and pretty quiet. The driveway is teeny weeny but I'm becoming quite the master at driving my CRV in and out.

I can't find my dishes.... that's my only problem. So I won't add a photo of my incomplete dining room.

Slumber Party!!!!

2008-09-11T09:04:00.000-07:00

Ok, So this is a bit late... But on Saturday I took the 4 oldest girls from the Faith House: Jessica (7) Wilma (7) Carla (5) and Marina (4) and Marianela from the toddler house to the guest house for a sleep over. The guest house is set up like a regular house except that in the bedrooms it has bunk beds to house the groups of volunteers that come to FHC.

I had prepared the girls before hand that we were going to do this and asked them what they wanted to eat. In unison everyone asked for Mac n' cheese and hotdogs. So that's what we did.

I made it for them while they ran wild around the house. Then they helped me make chocolate pudding on the stove: none of that instant stuff for these princesses! =)

So after they gobbled up dinner, we played games and giggled. Then I painted everyone's nails and we giggled. After our manicures, we watched a movie in our pjs and ate popcorn. Then we all spread out on the bunk beds and giggled some more. In the morning, I filled the bath tub as full as I could with bubbles. (These girls all take showers) and that was a major highlight!

Then we got dressed and off to church we went.

I'm not sure who had more fun... them or me. It was such a blast!

Now when Marianela sees me she points and says, "That's the lady who paints finger nails!"

I can't wait to do this again!

Myrtle the Turtle

2008-09-02T19:51:00.000-07:00

When I was a child, a very young child, my family was given a turtle as a pet. She came from the jungle and she was always kind of my brother's more than anyone else's. Zac named her Myrtle.
I found Myrtle dead in my parent's back yard today. I cried like a little baby. Wow, did I cry.
She has been part of our family since I can remember. Then she was a Precious Miracles pet for many years. My kids adored the turtle! When I closed down PM last year my Mom happily took her back. She's been living at my parents this whole time.
And now she's gone. I'm not exactly sure how she died but I suppose that's not important. I'm so sad.
I called Zac this afternoon to tell him. He was sweet to me (read: didn't blame me!)
She was at least 25 years old but we really have no idea as to her exact age since she was full grown when we received her.
Ok, so that's my news for today. =(

Wandering and Wondering

2008-08-31T17:17:00.000-07:00

Hey friends,
Ok, So here's the deal. I've been trying to write very little because I don't want you guys to stop reading 'cause you're bored. And I try to not get too emotional (a HUGE task for me!!) And I try to stay positive. But at the suggestion of my good friend, Meredith, I'm going to be a little more honest.
I'm frustrated. There I said it.
I KNOW I'm being obedient to God in this stage of my life. I know without any hesitation that He wants me in Ecuador. But what I don't know is why.
I feel like I'm currently doing a job that someone else could do. I'm helping out at FHC and I truly am happy to do so. I love and admire and respect the Vaughns and their home for children more than I could ever express. So I'm happy to help further their organization in any way that I can.
But, I feel like I'm not being used to my full potential. I used to run an orphanage for crying out loud. I used to fee like I was saving lives and making a difference in the world. I don't now. I feel like the Vaughns were doing just peachy without me and now they're happy to have me but basically they could take me or leave me.
I wish I knew what God had in store. I wish I knew how long this period of my life was going to last. If I knew it was just a few months and then something spectacular was going to happen, it would be easier to trudge (is that a word?) through. But what if this is my life for the next few years?!
I just wish I knew what I was doing was making some type of impact.
The kids at FHC are so amazing and beautiful. All precious little miracles themselves. I already have my favorites...wink wink. There are so many more "out there" that need help. Should I start up my home again? Should I brave that storm yet again? Have I matured and learned enough to do it differently? Can I be effective if I do that type of ministry? Should I start up another similar ministry? What would that look like?
I've been asking God these questions. The only answer I get is that He has me where He wants me for now. And once again, I'm frustrated. My prayer right now is that I will learn to be content in every situation. How many times in my life as the Director of PM did I wish for less responsibility and less stress? Now I have those things and I'm still complaining. The grass is always greener right?

Meanwhile I went to see an apartment today. It was in the PERFECT spot and it's brand new and adorable. It's ittybitty though. It may still work. I have 2 appointments tomorrow to see 2 other places a little closer to my price range then the one I saw today. So, hopefully something will turn up.

Latacunga

2008-08-25T16:57:00.000-07:00

Last week (Weds and Thurs) I was able to go to Latacunga the city about 2 hours away from Quito where 3 of the Precious Miracles are. Keep in mind I hadn't seen "my" boys in over a year. Luis Eduardo was a little apprehensive but he warmed up to me right away. He is so cute!

Mateo remembered me right away and jumped into my arms and stroked my face and kissed me. Wow! I missed that! =)

Juan Marcos I'm sure never did remember me but he was also very friendly.

My friend Katherine made the kids beanie caps and they were a HUGE hit. Thanks Katherine!!!! The whole 2 days I was there they REFUSED to take the hats off. SO cute! The tias tried to snag a couple too!

It was great to see the kids and see how much they've improved. I'm going to try to make a trip to Latacunga twice a month to help out at FHC there.

Now I'm back in Quito and keeping busy. I can't remember if I've ever had a Mon-Fri 9-5 job. It's weird. Even in college I had crazy hours and crazy jobs. Now I'm trying to be disciplined and work "normal" hours. I am thoroughly enjoying my job. =) I am not thoroughly enjoying being so far away from my friends and my fam. =(

Scrapbooks, field trips, and a mouse

2008-08-18T18:05:00.001-07:00

I officially started my new job on Thursday. So far I love it. It's a perfect fit for me. Thursday I held babies and scrapbooked. Seriously? This is my job?!?! I'm so blessed!

Friday I didn't go to FHC in order to work on
stuff with Precious Miracles (sponsorship letters, etc). I also have really tried to organize all my stuff that's in storage. That's a huge task in and of itself. I had a whole orphanage full of baby supplies. The blankets are multiplying on me I'm sure of it! And I have more onesies than there are stars in the sky! =-)
So anyway, I was pulling out bags, going through them and sorting. Some of it goes to FHC, some goes to needy families, and some goes toward another huge yard sale. When I opened one bag of my favorite bright orange blankets that say 'Jesus Loves Me' on them what to my wondering eyes did appear? A dead mouse. That's right you read correctly. EEEEEEK! I thought I was going to pass out from the smell. He was ittybitty but oh how he stunk!

Well that mouse has since been disposed of and my life somehow continued.
Saturday I sat in on a tour of FHC for a group of volunteers that came from the states. Then we piled 6 kids in a van and took them to a park. Seriously? This is my job?!?!

Today I got to see the other part of my job. With the help of 4 volunteers from the afore mentioned group we were in charge of 13 children of which 10 have special needs. They ranged in age from 3-13. We had them all day. From 8-6. That is hard work! I changed a LOT of cloth diapers (a new experience for me), tried to get everyone's lunch and dinner heated and served at approximately the same time. We had to spoon feed most of the kids since they needed help. Of all days, it rained today so we had to keep all 13 inside and occupied. I can't believe we all survived! I have such a huge amount of respect for the caregivers of FHC. They have a tough job and they do it with such excellence. God bless them!

2008-08-12T17:50:00.000-07:00

Second Weekend in Quito

2008-08-12T17:07:00.001-07:00

Is anyone reading these? =) Please feel free to leave comments. I'm not sure if it's worth my time to post stuff here.

I had an interesting weekend. Friday I went to Nataly's house to wish her a happy 5th birthday. She's so big! That afternoon I got food poisoning. Yay! I'm officially initiated back to Ecuador and my immune system is getting used to new germies.

Saturday my parents and I hosted the mother of all yard sales. Other yard sales will be forever jealous of this one. We sold everything that was not bolted down. It was great. After the exhausting yard sale we went to a beautiful wedding. Honestly I didn't really even know the couple but I got to go 'cause my Dad performed the ceremony. The 10th of August is Ecuador's Independence Day and the reception was downtown Quito. So we saw some gorgeous fireworks and downtown all lit up with gorgeous lights. It was amazing!

Sunday I took 3 little girls to church with me. When I went to pick them up Carla ran out to the front door and said, "Hey Mommy!" Like I never left. She's precious!
Sunday afternoon we had part 2 of our yard sale and sold even more... wow!

The last couple days I've been working on errands that need to get done and I've gotten a lot accomplished.
My dad left Monday super early and Mom leaves Thursday. Then I'm officially "alone" here.
Thursday is also the day I officially start my new job.... HURRAY!

So here are my prayer requests:
1. That I will be able to easily overcome the upcoming hurdles (driver's license, taxes, health insurance, etc)
2. For strength in being ultra independent without my parents around.
3. For a great group of friends that will be support for me (this request is already happening for me!!!! but pray anyway!)
4. Oh and that my tummy will be stronger than it has proven to be. Don't want to go through that again for a looooooong time.

Busy...busy

2008-08-06T05:53:00.000-07:00

Things have been kinda crazy right now. So much going on! I have seen five of my 10 kids so far and they have all been happy to see me! They all look so great! I have been smothered with hugs and kisses! I don't think I realized how much I missed being smothered until I saw them.
Today I see one more of my boys with his foster mom and tomorrow I see my little Flor with her foster mom. Friday is Nataly's 5th birthday and I'll see her and her sister, Joselyn again.

I flew in Saturday and went to church on Sunday. It was so great to see everyone there again.
Monday I had an "interview" for a potential job and I GOT IT! I'll be working at For His Children starting next week.
Monday night I went to my parents Bible study group and it was nice to connect with them again (I used to go before when I lived here.)
Yesterday we spent a day getting as grungy as possible sorting and cleaning. As my parents are leaving Ecuador after 30 years there is a lot to be done here at the house. That has kept us busy since I got here. Saturday there's a huge yard sale. Hopefully most of this stuff will sell. That would be a huge relief for my parents!

The pics are from FHC. In the group pic the 2 boys in wheelchairs are "mine." and then Carla is in both pictures. Aren't my kids cute?

I'm home!..?

2008-08-03T07:10:00.000-07:00

I flew into Quito last night and am getting ready to go to church here pretty soon. Just wanted to let y'all know I made it.
It's VBS sunday today so the church should be full of little ones! YAY! Among them, I'm hoping to see "my" Carla, Nataly, and Joselyn. I am mentally prepared for them not to come running up to me and tell me how much they missed me. =) I just hope they don't run the other way!!!

For those of you who were praying, I made it through customs just peachy. I got a bit nervous as she ran my passport and punched a gazillion things into her computer. Then when she was done she just smiled at me and said, "Welcome home."

Thanks for praying!
Don't stop. I'm about to drive the streets of Quito again. Yikes!

2008-07-25T07:12:00.001-07:00

“How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world." -Anne Frank

Back from Romania

2008-07-23T12:02:00.000-07:00

As you may know, my one year furlough is nearing its end. I was given the opportunity to go to Hungary and Romania this month and I hoped that during the trip, I would have answers as to where God wanted me to serve Him.
Well, I just spent 11 days in those countries (and am still a bit jet lagged!) It was an interesting trip to say the least. It was not at all what I expected but I keep reminding myself that there are no surprises to God. It was an emotional journey and an eye-opening one. I am not entirely sure why God had me go but I do know that He will reveal His plan for me when He chooses to do so. One thing He did reveal to me is that my work in Ecuador is not over. I already had a trip planned for the 2nd of August. Originally I was thinking I would go back and tie up loose ends. Now I know that I'm going to move back to Quito on that date. So the loose ends needing to be tied up are on this end, in the states. I have a little over a week to get things ready for my trip. It's definitely sudden and that scares me a bit. Overall, I am very excited to go back and see my little ones, and get started on the rest of my life!