I got word today from Nataly and Joselyn's "new" parents. It's official. The girls have been assigned to their forever family. From the little that I know as of today (pictures with detailed descriptions, and a letter) I could not have hand-picked a more suitable family for these 2 precious miracles.
I should be ecstatic right? So why can I hardly see the computer screen through the tears in my eyes? This part of my job is always a pardox. It is always bittersweet. I have been praying for this family since 2006. I have been praying that God would select and prepare the best family for these two little girls. And He has! They seem so ideal. And although I've been praying for this to happen, now that it IS happening, my heart is breaking.
As of tomorrow I will have been their foster mom for 5 months. That doesn't seem like a very long time. But it is 5 months of 24/7. Every waking moment (and some of the asleep ones too!) have revolved around these girls. I love them so much. I really feel like I've gotten a handle on this mom thing. We have a good thing going. Why does it have to end? I can't picture my days without them. I can't picture my life without them.
I don't feel ready to let them go. Would I ever be ready though?
None of us ever have the assurance of tomorrow. Our lives can change in the blink of an eye. I see it as a blessing and a privilege to have a set time frame of when mine will change. I will enjoy every last minute, every last experience, every last detail. I will treasure them until the day comes where I have to release my grasp on my little girls.
I should be ecstatic right? So why can I hardly see the computer screen through the tears in my eyes? This part of my job is always a pardox. It is always bittersweet. I have been praying for this family since 2006. I have been praying that God would select and prepare the best family for these two little girls. And He has! They seem so ideal. And although I've been praying for this to happen, now that it IS happening, my heart is breaking.
As of tomorrow I will have been their foster mom for 5 months. That doesn't seem like a very long time. But it is 5 months of 24/7. Every waking moment (and some of the asleep ones too!) have revolved around these girls. I love them so much. I really feel like I've gotten a handle on this mom thing. We have a good thing going. Why does it have to end? I can't picture my days without them. I can't picture my life without them.
I don't feel ready to let them go. Would I ever be ready though?
None of us ever have the assurance of tomorrow. Our lives can change in the blink of an eye. I see it as a blessing and a privilege to have a set time frame of when mine will change. I will enjoy every last minute, every last experience, every last detail. I will treasure them until the day comes where I have to release my grasp on my little girls.
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